Dear Blake and Nakayla,
First, I would like to say, this letter was written on 16 April 2013, if you do your calculations right (and you should if you can read and understand all of this), you will know that the both of you were still very young. This young:
Please know that Mommy and Daddy love the both of you as much as each other. And while we cannot give you exactly the same of everything, we do our best to balance it all out. You should realize by now that the both of you are very different. With the main difference being Blake, you’re a boy, and Nakayla, you’re a girl. This difference alone means the both of you live by rules that may vary a little from one another’s.
However, one thing I must make clear. There is one thing that will be applied across the board. If either of you want to have children after you’re married, you are to care for them on your own.
Daddy said he doesn’t mind looking after your children, provided that you hire a maid for us. But ultimately, I still think it’s best that you do your part as parents when you have your own children in future, just like Daddy and I did our part for the both of you. It not only makes your relationship with your children better, but with your spouse too.
If you need alternate weekends or certain days to yourself and your spouse to rekindle whatever sparks, I’ll be glad to help out – just like your grandma did for mommy. But it will be an absolute NO if that involves you and your spouse going overseas. If you’re gonna go on a holiday, bring your child(ren) along. Don’t leave them behind like this, ok? (Hint: I’m telling you to take daddy and me along!)
Mommy knows I cannot hold on to the both of you forever. Holding on tight will make things miserable for everyone in the long run, because I know we will definitely have a clash of mindsets and believes at some point in time, especially after you have children. A lot of things change when you become parents yourself. And I don’t want to pull the reigns when I was the one who helped spread your wings to fly in the first place. I want you to fly in the sky, not in an enclosure.
While I don’t want to map out your entire life for you till the day I die, I do hope that whenever you need a listening ear, or someone to hug you while you cry, or need some words of advice, you will come to Daddy and/or Mommy. We may not always know what the outcome will be, or what’s best for you, but we will always be here for you.
Things will definitely get tough, but it won’t be all too bad, as long as you and your spouse share the same special love and respect that Daddy and I have for each other. If there is anything you must takeaway from this long letter that started with me telling you to take care of your own children, you must learn that the person you chose to marry, is the person you chose to fight alongside with. You cannot choose the country you were born in, the parents you were born to, nor the siblings you were given, but you can choose who to spend the rest of your life with. He or she will be all you will have left when parents move on to the next world, and the children have their own families. So choose wisely.
P.S. Your grandma (my mommy) once told me, “As a couple, you must stand up for Sean (that’s your daddy, in case you don’t know his real name. Haha!) in our family. Likewise, Sean must stand up for you in his family.” So I’m passing these wise words onto you. Remember, fight together as a couple. Don’t fight each other!